Trusting
The leaping out of resources started during my divorce
in the 80’s when I concluded in the first half of life I thought God had made
me bright and set me free…that I trusted myself, my intellect, my persistence,
my motivation. Then when divorce took me to my knees I decided to “let go and
let God,” the parlance of that time.
When I couldn’t find a file for a lecture, I would just let go and a
book would fall of the shelf or some other resource would land on my path, the
right quote, the right story, the right illustration. When I was in despair I would just let go. I
went to the Unity church which was very inclusive of a variety of beliefs. I
learned to trust my intuition more as that small, still voice and explored who
I was in my own right. I meditated, explored guided imagery, and
metaphysics.
I vowed that if divorce took away my ability to trust
men, I would have given away too much.
Starting
Over
I remarried, took on role of stepmother and blender of
families, and moved more into my private practice of traveling as a speaker and
writing. I read about spirituality and sexuality. I was drawn to new
adventures, longings, bunny trails to traverse…holistic nursing, Sage-ing, the
expressive arts. I set intentions and saw marvelous synchronicities respond.
Joseph Campbell said if you want something, put it out to the universe, tell
everyone you know, (some of us call that prayer) and it will be as if 1000
unseen hands are there to assist you. And so my journey continued, busy, busy,
busy.
Asking
What’s Next
As I began to explore conscious aging, in my 50’s when
I still thought I knew a lot…not as much as in my 20’s…but still a lot, I began
to ask, “What’s next?” I facilitated
workshops on Sage-ing and the expressive arts for meaning making. A definition
of spiritualty I favor is “meaning making.” I continue to teach nursing
electives on self-care through complementary therapies and the expressive arts.
I continue to update a nursing text on communications and still ask, “What’s
next?”
Pondering
the Spiritual and Religious
Two books fell off the shelf, OK they were gifts. A
priest friend gave us Jesus: A pilgrimage
by James Martin. Our son in 2008 gave us Timothy Keller’s book mentioned above.
And so I find myself reading these books and thinking. My son, a Presbyterian
minister, and I have started regular dialogue by phone. We read and discuss and
ponder together. He says Timothy Keller’s book represents his beliefs and so,
finally, I sat down to read it and just finished this morning. I had been
called to create a mandorla while reading this, an overlapping of circles in
which one makes art in each about 2 opposites, this one on doubt and belief.
The center represents where the two overlap. I couldn’t begin it but a friend,
expressive artist and Quaker pastor, was visiting and she suggested we do it
together. We meet when she is in town and make art together often at a table at
a Starbucks. I sent the photo of the art to my son and we will talk about it. Our son is an artist, too, and gifted me with an
incredible painting honoring our journey together. And now the words, “Ask,
Seek, and Knock,” want to become art. We’ll see.
Below is a sample of a mandorla I created several
years ago working with “anxiety” on the left and “trust” on the right. Where
the circles met became a safety net which to me represents God.
Resources:
Here is the mandorla process from my book Art in Small Spaces: Art at the bedside,
a guidebook of 35 processes for self-discovery and wellness. (Available in
print or E-book, a pdf file) Email to order: julia@constantsource.com
Process: Mandorla…working
with opposites 
Purpose: To
offer a unique process for exploring opposites in life or for working toward a
resolution of inner conflict
Supplies: Paper
with 2 overlapping circles and art supplies of choice for
drawing/painting. Choose paper based on
medium you offer. Use a plate or cd to trace circles.
Directions/Language of Invitation:
When
a client is working with two opposites in his/her life, offer the mandorla.
Suggest making a mandala for each opposite and then in the overlapping space,
make art of where they meet, the union of the opposites, the resolution of a
conflict, the “liminal” space of transformation where they meet. (Mandorla
comes from the Italian word for almond, the shape of the overlap in the
circles.)
Variations/Special
precautions/Lessons learned: Colored pencils or
watercolor with a fine brush give control for details but any art materials can
be used. The drawing above illustrates
the liminal space but offer 2 complete overlapping circles, without the line
breaks.
Processing: Ask
the client to tell you about the art. Offer an opportunity to journal about
insights arising from the art.
